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A Message from Mike Anfinson
Jacob's Father
My name is Mike Anfinson. In September of 1998 tragedy struck.
We have had much time to think about the day Jacob died. We have been through
two trials. Hell would be a step up from what we have been living with since the
day Jacob died.
Heidi is not a murderer. I would not be with her if she was. She is a gentle and
kind person. Industrious. I look to her in admiration.
Anyone that knows her knows this to be true. Otherwise, she would not be my
wife. All of her friends and her entire family stand behind her and believe that
Jacob's death was an accident.
I would have left her if I believed for one second that she is guilty of the
severity of the crime she is convicted of.
No, she did not tell the truth following Jacob's death [claiming Jacob was
kidnapped]. No, she could not believe the truth. Try for a moment to imagine
yourself in her place. Could you believe it yourself? What would you do if your
fatigue and negligence caused your son's death? Could you face your husband,
family and God himself with this reality?
Yes, we all know she did not have the right response to the situation. She was
in shock. Is this the definition of Second Degree Murder?
Are these the laws? Is this the interpretation of the law that we have imposed
to protect society?
She is guilty of poor judgment based on a severe case of panic. Possibly due to
Post-Partum Depression.
This was our first and only child.
Heidi was dealing from the effects of post pregnancy. Exhaustion. Overwhelming
responsibility. She had worked hard as a waitress till the eighth-month of her
pregnancy to save money for when she would be raising Jacob. The whole family
was here the first week to rejoice in the miracle. She was tired. Can't anyone,
even the prosecution, believe this was a stupid lack of judgment?
I feel that I am to blame as much as she is. I should have been here instead of
out four-wheeling. I should have perceived the situation.
The prosecution, with the help of the media, painted her as a butcher without
substantiation.
They have accused her, if not myself, of abuse, of poisoning Jacob with alcohol,
of smashing him with rocks, and many more horrible things, all of which I
believe have been disproved by experts in both trials. They have no hard
evidence of these acts. Maybe because this evidence does not exist. No blood. No
bruises. In Heidi's frenzy, could she be so meticulous as to cover all this hard
evidence up?
My beloved, blessed son had been reduced to a bunch of slides, pictures and
evidence.
She loved Jacob. She and I have had little time to mourn our loss. She, the
family and I now are broken by the harshness of the verdict - 50 years with a
42.5 minimum.
I guess the State saw what they wanted to see. People want to believe the media,
papers, TV news, etc. which seems perpetuated by a strange human vindication.
Only recently, with great sadness, I try to understand.
Sadly, people want to believe the worst of their fellow human beings.
With the other newborn and child deaths in general, people grab onto
conclusions. Some things seem easier to believe than the truth at times.
We are all bombarded with this onslaught of violence and evil. The men and women
of law enforcement can't help but be jaded by all of the horrible acts of
people. How could you be objective all the time?
Can't people understand the awful, irrational mistakes that Heidi made? The
fixation of denial she wanted to believe after the accident? The biological
condition that existed at the time?
I'm as much to blame for the truth not being told at the time. I had to grasp
onto a conclusion, which would seem plausible at the time. I wanted so much to
believe that a stranger was responsible. Only now with hindsight do I wish I had
thought about it longer. Heidi did not know what happened at the time; she was
in denial and did not know what to say when she couldn't accept the truth
herself. If she had wanted to kill Jacob, don't you think she would have come up
with a better alibi?
Not only have I lost my son, I now stand to lose my wife and the links between
our families, the past, present and future. My family, my friends and I are all
devastated. What is the logic of the State's vindictiveness?
What does society benefit from sending Heidi to jail and destroying all of these
other lives too?
She doesn't deserve to spend a day in prison. Unfortunately, she may serve the
rest of her life there. How can these things happen? Our system of so called
"justice" needs to be reviewed. She is not a criminal. She caused a tragic
accident, but she is not a criminal. I’m sure you’ll find little to
rehabilitate. She has no criminal history. What are we trying to achieve?
She has to deal with the grief and guilt of her mistake for the rest of her
life.
If it were your wife, daughter, relation, etc. would life in prison be the
punishment you would impose? Would you feel a victory has been achieved for our
society? Somehow saving and protecting us, or making an example to stop any
future human frailty?
I sincerely hope the guilty verdict serves some higher power, because the family
and I don't understand.
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